My father has been sulking all day, because....
he found three straight pins in the drivers seat of my car.
Keep in mind, my father knows that I'm Muslim. Keep in mind, I told him months ago that I wear hijab on weekends.
Nevertheless, he went out to start my car, and came back livid.
"Why are there straight pins in your seat?"
My first instinct was to lie (horrible, I know)...but then I realized 1.) nothing I would come up with would make sense and he wouldn't believe me and 2.) he KNOWS I'm Muslim so what's the big deal.
"Why do you think they're there?" (ugh, I hate that I sound like a rebellious teenager)
"Why ARE THEY THERE?"
"You know, for (motion around my face with my hand). I told you before that I wear it on weekends."
(visibly upset) "Why would you do something like that?"
"Because I like it." (not the best reason, but hey, it's what I came up with....he doesn't believe God commanded it so this argument might even be better in this instance.)
"Why would you do that to yourself? You're suppressing/oppressing yourself."
"What is it stopping me from doing?"
aimless, angry, rambling...
"What is it stopping me from doing?"
"A lot of things. You're living like your from the 1200's."
Keep in mind. This conversation was going on at church. It ended around that point with no real resolution. Three hours later, my dad continues to sulk. I hate upsetting him, but I am 22 years old, married, and have a child. If I can choose to have a husband and a child...CAN'T I CHOOSE WHAT'S ON MY BODY????????????????????????????
I never thought the day would come when my conservative father would pressure me to dress immodestly. It came last summer, though. And it will continue through this summer, and maybe all the way until one of us leaves this world. Insha'Allah he accepts it before we reach that point!
Living like I'm from the 1200's...uh huh. Because I work, am educated, drive, vote, etc. etc. etc. That small piece of cloth doesn't inhibit any of my rights.
10 comments:
*hugs* I hope it gets better. Parents can be so unreasonable and stuck in their ways. They hate anything that reminds them of things you do they don't like.
Yeah I don't really understand the living in 1200s thing (I get it that too lol), since women never stopped wearing it (well not all). Its like Muslims wore it before then, and have continued to wear it. So is drinking water like living in the 1200s since people did that back then too?
I don't think, Inshallah, that the fight about dress will last forever. It will lesson after time, Inshallah, and also after you move in with your husband. Inshallah things will get smoother before then of course!!
Salaam alaikum hun,i know exactly what you mean its so weird lol its happened to me a couple of times with my dad a the straight pins that i pin my hijab with :)
May HE makes things easier for you (and us). ameen.
Aww may God help you sis. It must've been so hard to hear that, especially at church where modest dress should be encouraged.
You are approaching it the right way though God willing. Like AlabasterMuslim said, women have been covering their hair for thousands of years so may God bless you with their knowledge and strength!
Kinda weird when Paulus himself said that good women should wear veil if htey were christian..a bit more about this
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Veil
Well its all good, nowdays its 1200...my sisters and the converts i know used to hear they live int he 7 century :P So in some 20 or 30 years mabye ppl will tell us we live in the 20th century ;)
Nikki, maybe you should explain to him in more than "because i like it ". exaplin why women in Islam wear hijab. He will understand and his refusal right now is probably based on his fear for you and what he hears about hijab and how it represents women.
Inshallah the day that he will understand and accepts you is soon :)
He will continue to think of you as a child as long as you continue to live like one, under his roof, eating his food, married to someone who doesn't provide you with a home of your own.
If you lived in your husband's country you would be expected to defer to his father and mother, and as long as your lived in his parent's home and even when you had moved on you would find the family would expect you to live by their standards.
as-salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah,
inshallah with time your father will come to accept it more and more.
I think right now he wants to be in denial about it all. Seeing those straight pins makes it harder for him to stay in denial.
I agree both with anonymous and wafa
Act like an independant adult,you are a married woman or not??
And why can't you stand up and explain Islam the way it should be,
Really doesn't Allah count more for you ???
Ayah
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