Just something interesting to read. As a whole, I didn't find any of their perceptions shocking.
http://www.wunrn.com/news/2008/03_08/03_03_08/030308_female.htm
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Costochondritis
Dreadful condition. When the doctor diagnosed me (over a year ago) he said, oh it shouldn't take more than 10 days to clear up. Hmph. It's still here. And at it's worst this week.
So, if you're totally confused. Costochondritis is inflammation of the cartilage connecting your ribcage to your sternum. It's painful. I went to the doctor because it felt like I was having a heart attack multiple nights in a row. On and off for over a year now it comes back. This week it's mainly breathing that I'm having trouble with. When I prostrate in prayer I feel like my chest is crushing in on itself and I come up out of breath. When I just carried my 27 lb. son up the apartment steps (asleep so totally dead weight) I thought I might collapse while trying to find my key.
Don't take breathing for granted. In a week or two it will clear up without me noticing (insha'Allah). I'll totally forget about it and the pain. And then it'll come back again. And when it's back (like now) I start to wonder if it ever went away in the first place or if I just wasn't "looking for it" like I am now.
I'm crazy. And in pain. I bet that stupid air mattress is making it worse.
(FIL has the real bed for 1 more week)
And if you're totally curious. Things with my father in law are going well. If you asked me after that first week, I would've sounded much more cynical, hence, the lack of posts. I don't like to type things I'll regret. He's a really nice guy and a WONDERFUL grandfather.
Parenting advice is just sometimes unwelcome, you know?
So, if you're totally confused. Costochondritis is inflammation of the cartilage connecting your ribcage to your sternum. It's painful. I went to the doctor because it felt like I was having a heart attack multiple nights in a row. On and off for over a year now it comes back. This week it's mainly breathing that I'm having trouble with. When I prostrate in prayer I feel like my chest is crushing in on itself and I come up out of breath. When I just carried my 27 lb. son up the apartment steps (asleep so totally dead weight) I thought I might collapse while trying to find my key.
Don't take breathing for granted. In a week or two it will clear up without me noticing (insha'Allah). I'll totally forget about it and the pain. And then it'll come back again. And when it's back (like now) I start to wonder if it ever went away in the first place or if I just wasn't "looking for it" like I am now.
I'm crazy. And in pain. I bet that stupid air mattress is making it worse.
(FIL has the real bed for 1 more week)
And if you're totally curious. Things with my father in law are going well. If you asked me after that first week, I would've sounded much more cynical, hence, the lack of posts. I don't like to type things I'll regret. He's a really nice guy and a WONDERFUL grandfather.
Parenting advice is just sometimes unwelcome, you know?
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Wonderful Summer Blazer
So, the picture totally doesn't do it justice, but I bought this Miley Cyrus (yes, Miley Cyrus) blazer in both black and white from Wal-Mart yesterday. They were $14.99 a piece and are a jersey knit which is absolutely wonderful for summer, although the black I probably won't wear much till fall.
Last summer I did a lot of "under layering," i.e. a tight-ish shirt underneath a short sleeved shirt. This summer I'm trying to stay cooler and have found that either just wide sleeved long sleeve cotton tunics (like the ones from East Essence, I have 3) or a short sleeved or tank top shirt underneath a cotton cardigan keep you much cooler than the tight "Egyptian" layered look. I'll save those looks for fall, as well. The 90+ degree heat is just too stifling. I bought a medium, so 1 size larger than I would normally buy so that I could button it loosely. It is also long enough that it just covers my rear. Some may feel comfortable with it only over a skirt, but I think I will wear it with dress pants to teach.
In other completely unrelated news, my son is here eating CORN CHEX. I am so excited! We are on day 6 of our corn trial which is his first grain, since rice and oats both make him violently ill. Corn opens up SO MANY more possibilities and I am so excited that he has almost "passed." They even sell corn pasta online, so I could make him macaroni! (with tomato sauce, he can't have dairy yet). Hoorah! Also, he has passed lamb and 4 days of fish(tilapia). We aren't totally out of the woods yet but things are really looking up. :)
Last summer I did a lot of "under layering," i.e. a tight-ish shirt underneath a short sleeved shirt. This summer I'm trying to stay cooler and have found that either just wide sleeved long sleeve cotton tunics (like the ones from East Essence, I have 3) or a short sleeved or tank top shirt underneath a cotton cardigan keep you much cooler than the tight "Egyptian" layered look. I'll save those looks for fall, as well. The 90+ degree heat is just too stifling. I bought a medium, so 1 size larger than I would normally buy so that I could button it loosely. It is also long enough that it just covers my rear. Some may feel comfortable with it only over a skirt, but I think I will wear it with dress pants to teach.
In other completely unrelated news, my son is here eating CORN CHEX. I am so excited! We are on day 6 of our corn trial which is his first grain, since rice and oats both make him violently ill. Corn opens up SO MANY more possibilities and I am so excited that he has almost "passed." They even sell corn pasta online, so I could make him macaroni! (with tomato sauce, he can't have dairy yet). Hoorah! Also, he has passed lamb and 4 days of fish(tilapia). We aren't totally out of the woods yet but things are really looking up. :)
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Heat Wave
Yesterday was considered a "holiday" since the 4th of July fell on Sunday, so hubby didn't have to work. We went out of town to eat at our favorite Turkish restaurant and go to a lake. Mash'Allah, after eating we were driving toward the lake when we received a phone call. It was my BIL, (husband's sister's husband, get it?) telling us he and his family were right behind us on the road headed for the same place.
It was an unexpected, yet nice, surprise. As I mentioned in a previous post, my SIL is currently stuck in the kingdom until Thursday, insha'Allah she gets here safely. I wish she had been with us too, but my BIL's parents are visiting from KSA as well as his sister. It was my first time meeting her and she was very very nice mash'Allah. Unfortunately I can't really pronounce her name, but...maybe in time.
It was SO hot and everyone at the beach was wearing not much of anything, of course. I chose to wear an abaya (which I don't usually do) due to the heat hoping that it would keep me cooler by allowing more air flow. It was black (it's my only one, my MIL sent it from KSA) but yet it did keep me fairly cool. My BIL's sister, poor thing, of course was not wearing an abaya, because she has to wear one every day back home and was probably enjoying having the freedom to choose her clothing. That's all well and good, but you have to choose very wisely in the summer. She had on a black long sleeved undershirt (so the sleeves were fairly tight, i.e. HOT) a white short sleeved shirtdress, and black jeans, black hijab, and black shoes. I might wear this combination in the summer only if I know I'm going straight from air conditioning to air conditioning, not on an outdoor outing, though. We went out on a boat and I thought the breeze made it feel quite comfortable. She got used to it once we started moving but initially she was fanning herself saying "sun, sun" in Arabic (shams, shams).
This abayat outing has made me want to own a couple more, in lighter colors. If even the black one offered more relief from the heat than my maxi skirts or tunics and jeans, then I can only imagine the comfort a khaki colored one would offer.
Unfortunately (or fortunately depending on how you're looking at it) I did break down and buy two maxi skirts from Old Navy. I'm feeling a bit guilty and don't really want to put out the money for an abaya right now. There's four at East Essence (all inexpensive) that I'd love to have, but I'll probably, insha'Allah, wait until I feel a bit better about my finances.
I've always enjoyed shopping, but since I've been dressing modestly it's become a bigger problem, I think. I think this is because when I see something hijab friendly I feel I am so lucky to find such an item that I MUST BUY IT. Where, when I dressed like the masses, there wasn't such an urgency because I could find clothes anywhere at anytime for any occasion. Now I can't just go to the mall expecting to find something nice to wear to this or that, so I try and be "prepared" for future invitations.
I'm ridiculous.
Anybody else loving abayas this summer?
It was an unexpected, yet nice, surprise. As I mentioned in a previous post, my SIL is currently stuck in the kingdom until Thursday, insha'Allah she gets here safely. I wish she had been with us too, but my BIL's parents are visiting from KSA as well as his sister. It was my first time meeting her and she was very very nice mash'Allah. Unfortunately I can't really pronounce her name, but...maybe in time.
It was SO hot and everyone at the beach was wearing not much of anything, of course. I chose to wear an abaya (which I don't usually do) due to the heat hoping that it would keep me cooler by allowing more air flow. It was black (it's my only one, my MIL sent it from KSA) but yet it did keep me fairly cool. My BIL's sister, poor thing, of course was not wearing an abaya, because she has to wear one every day back home and was probably enjoying having the freedom to choose her clothing. That's all well and good, but you have to choose very wisely in the summer. She had on a black long sleeved undershirt (so the sleeves were fairly tight, i.e. HOT) a white short sleeved shirtdress, and black jeans, black hijab, and black shoes. I might wear this combination in the summer only if I know I'm going straight from air conditioning to air conditioning, not on an outdoor outing, though. We went out on a boat and I thought the breeze made it feel quite comfortable. She got used to it once we started moving but initially she was fanning herself saying "sun, sun" in Arabic (shams, shams).
This abayat outing has made me want to own a couple more, in lighter colors. If even the black one offered more relief from the heat than my maxi skirts or tunics and jeans, then I can only imagine the comfort a khaki colored one would offer.
Unfortunately (or fortunately depending on how you're looking at it) I did break down and buy two maxi skirts from Old Navy. I'm feeling a bit guilty and don't really want to put out the money for an abaya right now. There's four at East Essence (all inexpensive) that I'd love to have, but I'll probably, insha'Allah, wait until I feel a bit better about my finances.
I've always enjoyed shopping, but since I've been dressing modestly it's become a bigger problem, I think. I think this is because when I see something hijab friendly I feel I am so lucky to find such an item that I MUST BUY IT. Where, when I dressed like the masses, there wasn't such an urgency because I could find clothes anywhere at anytime for any occasion. Now I can't just go to the mall expecting to find something nice to wear to this or that, so I try and be "prepared" for future invitations.
I'm ridiculous.
Anybody else loving abayas this summer?
Sunday, July 4, 2010
Independence Day
Okay, I know many of my readers are not American, but for those of you who are, Happy Fourth of July!
I was festive as usual in a white maxi skirt, navy blue 3/4 sleeve t-shirt, navy blue underscarf, and red and white patterned shayla/hijab.
I've worn red, white, and blue on the fourth of July since I was little...and it's a hard habit to break. :)
I took off the hijab at my grandma's house, only to find, that my cousin was wearing the same outfit as me. She had on a white maxi skirt, a navy blue tank top, and a red and white patterned scarf around her neck. Even our shoes were similar (gladiator sandals) which was just weird. Fun, but weird.
My hometown (in which I no longer live) always hosts fireworks right behind my parents' house so we went down and watched them with the whole family. I saw an old friend and he asked me what I was up to, I had a bag of popcorn in my hand so I replied "Eatin' popcorn, standing here, being American." It was just one of the random things I say throughout my time in public, yet I kept thinking back to it. I never really think about being American, like I think about being Muslim, or even like I think of being Italian. It's just so "ordinary" to me, that I take it for granted.
I really am proud to be an American... like all those lame songs say. Huh. Who knew?
------------------------
In other news, my FIL and SIL are now scheduled to arrive Thursday the 8th insha'Allah. I'm excited but nervous all at the same time.
I was festive as usual in a white maxi skirt, navy blue 3/4 sleeve t-shirt, navy blue underscarf, and red and white patterned shayla/hijab.
I've worn red, white, and blue on the fourth of July since I was little...and it's a hard habit to break. :)
I took off the hijab at my grandma's house, only to find, that my cousin was wearing the same outfit as me. She had on a white maxi skirt, a navy blue tank top, and a red and white patterned scarf around her neck. Even our shoes were similar (gladiator sandals) which was just weird. Fun, but weird.
My hometown (in which I no longer live) always hosts fireworks right behind my parents' house so we went down and watched them with the whole family. I saw an old friend and he asked me what I was up to, I had a bag of popcorn in my hand so I replied "Eatin' popcorn, standing here, being American." It was just one of the random things I say throughout my time in public, yet I kept thinking back to it. I never really think about being American, like I think about being Muslim, or even like I think of being Italian. It's just so "ordinary" to me, that I take it for granted.
I really am proud to be an American... like all those lame songs say. Huh. Who knew?
------------------------
In other news, my FIL and SIL are now scheduled to arrive Thursday the 8th insha'Allah. I'm excited but nervous all at the same time.
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Maxi Skirts
I love love love maxi skirts. They are awesome in the summer, SO much cooler than jeans that stick to your legs. Also, I can wear them to teach (teachers here cannot wear jeans) so it feels "better" to buy something that I know I'll get more use out of.
How many maxi skirts...is too many maxi skirts, though? I have around 14...and I fear buying anymore would be overkill...BUT they have the MOST GORGEOUS skirt ever at Old Navy right now. And it's on my mind. I know it was on sale a few weeks ago, though, which makes me hesitate. Now it's $30. I know, inexpensive, right? Not for me...out of those 14 skirts, probably 3 of them were over $20. $15 is my standard maxi price while I did pay a ridiculous $50 for my tweed maxi. I bought it for job interviews and such, though, so it's not such a waste.
While on the topic of skirts, I was looking for a long jean skirt to love for months. I ordered one from Christa Taylor ($55) that looked cute on the website. On me it just looked like a sack, though. I returned it, and eventually East Essence put a nice one up on their site. I ordered the smallest size (prob around $30) and it's still way too big in the hips and too long. So, I finally got my skirt, but it's been hanging in the closet since it's arrival in April. I hate to pay more to have it altered, but I can't sew and my mum's not exceptional at it (i.e. a lot of pants she hemmed for me back in the day I was later a bit embarrassed to wear...they'd go from too long to too short :/ )
So, my maxi wearing ladies, how many skirts do you own? What's the most you've spent? The least? Have you ever bought the same style in multiple colors? AND how many have you ever bought at once?
I have yet to buy the same color in multiple styles, but some of mine are rather similar. I'm thinking about buying the Old Navy one in both grey/teal and black/pink, which is why I'm asking if that's acceptable. I think the most I've ever bought at once is two. Burlington Coat Factory always has a large selection in the summer and I'm lucky to narrow it down to two, especially with $15 prices.
I would wear maxi's everyday if I could. But my parents somehow equate that as more conservative than jeans and a tunic, and I think at times it makes them uncomfortable. I wish they'd look back and realize it's ALWAYS been my preference. In elementary school, I wore long dresses even on PE day. 5th grade awards program you have pictures of all my classmates in jeans and me in a long blue dress. I've always had a tendency to dress more feminine than the masses. It's just now that there's religion involved, it's not seen as me being an individual, but me giving up my individuality. ugh
How many maxi skirts...is too many maxi skirts, though? I have around 14...and I fear buying anymore would be overkill...BUT they have the MOST GORGEOUS skirt ever at Old Navy right now. And it's on my mind. I know it was on sale a few weeks ago, though, which makes me hesitate. Now it's $30. I know, inexpensive, right? Not for me...out of those 14 skirts, probably 3 of them were over $20. $15 is my standard maxi price while I did pay a ridiculous $50 for my tweed maxi. I bought it for job interviews and such, though, so it's not such a waste.
While on the topic of skirts, I was looking for a long jean skirt to love for months. I ordered one from Christa Taylor ($55) that looked cute on the website. On me it just looked like a sack, though. I returned it, and eventually East Essence put a nice one up on their site. I ordered the smallest size (prob around $30) and it's still way too big in the hips and too long. So, I finally got my skirt, but it's been hanging in the closet since it's arrival in April. I hate to pay more to have it altered, but I can't sew and my mum's not exceptional at it (i.e. a lot of pants she hemmed for me back in the day I was later a bit embarrassed to wear...they'd go from too long to too short :/ )
So, my maxi wearing ladies, how many skirts do you own? What's the most you've spent? The least? Have you ever bought the same style in multiple colors? AND how many have you ever bought at once?
I have yet to buy the same color in multiple styles, but some of mine are rather similar. I'm thinking about buying the Old Navy one in both grey/teal and black/pink, which is why I'm asking if that's acceptable. I think the most I've ever bought at once is two. Burlington Coat Factory always has a large selection in the summer and I'm lucky to narrow it down to two, especially with $15 prices.
I would wear maxi's everyday if I could. But my parents somehow equate that as more conservative than jeans and a tunic, and I think at times it makes them uncomfortable. I wish they'd look back and realize it's ALWAYS been my preference. In elementary school, I wore long dresses even on PE day. 5th grade awards program you have pictures of all my classmates in jeans and me in a long blue dress. I've always had a tendency to dress more feminine than the masses. It's just now that there's religion involved, it's not seen as me being an individual, but me giving up my individuality. ugh
Friday, July 2, 2010
Saudi Permission Rules
So, my SIL was supposed to come back home to the U.S. (she lives here with her husband who is in school, she's studying English, as well) about a week ago. She was going to fly with her inlaws so that she didn't have to fly alone with her 1 year old daughter. Her husband flew to KSA with her, but left a week later because he had summer courses at school.
So, when he left, he forgot something important, it seems. He forgot to give her a letter, granting her permission to fly back to the USA.
It makes me sick that something like that is even required. It makes even less sense when you think it through and realize a) she was with HIS PARENTS b) HE was already in the U.S.! she was coming back to be with HIM and c) her dad was there to vouch for her/grant her permission (not that a 21 year old should need it) as well. The whole permission for women is a load of crap if you ask me, but, I would think that at least one of the above three things in her favor would have gotten her on that plane.
She missed her flight. Her in-laws are here and she is not. Her husband faxed her the paper, so now she's been trying to book flights again.
On MONDAY, my husband told me that his father was flying over with his sister so that she wouldn't be alone. My SIL already has her MIL, FIL, and SIL staying in her three bedroom apartment with her, her husband, and their daughter, so my FIL would be staying with US.
Okay, extended houseguest, while we're still getting used to living together, that's cool. When?
THURSDAY. They were planning on coming THURSDAY. So, my SIL again, had a ticket, but my FIL was on a list for if one became available, and one didn't. For that reason, they both changed their flight and were going to arrive SATURDAY (i.e. TOMORROW). I've been going crazy cleaning and hiding contraband...(kidding, kidding...kind of)...worrying about cooking, getting stuff together for my husband and I to sleep on the floor of our son's room....
And then tonight, my husband gets a call. He laughs and laughs. And tells me he has a "funny story." My poor SIL was sent home from the airport again. Not for the permission problem again, but their ticket reservations were lost. I don't find it funny like my husband does, although I do feel guilty for being relieved that I have more time before I have to host my first house guest.
I've only ever met my FIL via skype. My husband works M-F, and is starting class 1h 30 min away on Tues. and Thurs. nights soon. That means a LOT of quality time with FIL. He's very religious, and from an older generation. This means I'm worried that my Islam won't hold up under scrutiny, and my housekeeping/cooking/parenting won't either.
So, when he left, he forgot something important, it seems. He forgot to give her a letter, granting her permission to fly back to the USA.
It makes me sick that something like that is even required. It makes even less sense when you think it through and realize a) she was with HIS PARENTS b) HE was already in the U.S.! she was coming back to be with HIM and c) her dad was there to vouch for her/grant her permission (not that a 21 year old should need it) as well. The whole permission for women is a load of crap if you ask me, but, I would think that at least one of the above three things in her favor would have gotten her on that plane.
She missed her flight. Her in-laws are here and she is not. Her husband faxed her the paper, so now she's been trying to book flights again.
On MONDAY, my husband told me that his father was flying over with his sister so that she wouldn't be alone. My SIL already has her MIL, FIL, and SIL staying in her three bedroom apartment with her, her husband, and their daughter, so my FIL would be staying with US.
Okay, extended houseguest, while we're still getting used to living together, that's cool. When?
THURSDAY. They were planning on coming THURSDAY. So, my SIL again, had a ticket, but my FIL was on a list for if one became available, and one didn't. For that reason, they both changed their flight and were going to arrive SATURDAY (i.e. TOMORROW). I've been going crazy cleaning and hiding contraband...(kidding, kidding...kind of)...worrying about cooking, getting stuff together for my husband and I to sleep on the floor of our son's room....
And then tonight, my husband gets a call. He laughs and laughs. And tells me he has a "funny story." My poor SIL was sent home from the airport again. Not for the permission problem again, but their ticket reservations were lost. I don't find it funny like my husband does, although I do feel guilty for being relieved that I have more time before I have to host my first house guest.
I've only ever met my FIL via skype. My husband works M-F, and is starting class 1h 30 min away on Tues. and Thurs. nights soon. That means a LOT of quality time with FIL. He's very religious, and from an older generation. This means I'm worried that my Islam won't hold up under scrutiny, and my housekeeping/cooking/parenting won't either.
Bridesmaid Dress Compromise
I don't know how many of you were really concerned about my sister and I working something out for her wedding, but we've reached a compromise. My mother actually made us meet at the dress store (she was there as well) to pick something out together. I would've liked something even more modest, but I understand even this was asking a LOT of her. (she's the oldest, and well, quite demanding to be honest...and I mean that in the nicest way possible)
This was the dress she chose as THE bridesmaid dress. It was supposed to be worn by everyone.
As you can see....there was no possible way I'd be seen in that in public. Once upon a time, yes, but I've been Muslim for over a year, and to suddenly regress to wearing something that revealing again would honestly make me feel ill. (not to mention my husband said he wouldn't be attending the wedding if I chose to wear it...heh)
My sister put on the above dress while I tried on 7 or more floor length numbers that came in her color (wisteria...which is a purple) to see which one coordinated the best. I am the matron of honor, which means it's not AS weird for me to be dressed differently, but nevertheless, I didn't want to look like I was in a different wedding altogether.
This was the dress she chose out of the ones I tried on.
It's a major improvement. Although the v is too deep for my liking and there's a slit in the back. (there has to be or one couldn't move! Keep in mind the woman modeling in the picture is a bit more curvy than myself. I don't have hips or a rear end so it's not as hour-glassy on me. (I really have no rear end, just flat all the way down, and I actually have only one hip due to scoliosis. :/ )
Also, I got her to say yes to this shrug in black (since her colors are purple and black):
Again, I'd like longer sleeves and the material is sheer. It's black though so I'm hoping it won't be completely translucent. They had no long sleeve jackets, and the only other 3/4 sleeve one was not sheer, but it had should pads that made me look like I "was going to fly away." (my sister's words, not mine)
I know it's not proper hijab, but it's the best I could do with the options I was given. Also, next to the rest of the wedding party (and probably most of the people in attendance), I'll obviously stand out as someone who was trying to dress more conservatively. Any thoughts? Please, if you just have complaints keep them to yourself. I KNOW it is not proper hijab, I've already said that, but my relationship with my sister is important and I think we both compromised gracefully. (although she thinks she gave in way more than I did...)
This was the dress she chose as THE bridesmaid dress. It was supposed to be worn by everyone.
My sister put on the above dress while I tried on 7 or more floor length numbers that came in her color (wisteria...which is a purple) to see which one coordinated the best. I am the matron of honor, which means it's not AS weird for me to be dressed differently, but nevertheless, I didn't want to look like I was in a different wedding altogether.
This was the dress she chose out of the ones I tried on.
It's a major improvement. Although the v is too deep for my liking and there's a slit in the back. (there has to be or one couldn't move! Keep in mind the woman modeling in the picture is a bit more curvy than myself. I don't have hips or a rear end so it's not as hour-glassy on me. (I really have no rear end, just flat all the way down, and I actually have only one hip due to scoliosis. :/ )
Also, I got her to say yes to this shrug in black (since her colors are purple and black):
Again, I'd like longer sleeves and the material is sheer. It's black though so I'm hoping it won't be completely translucent. They had no long sleeve jackets, and the only other 3/4 sleeve one was not sheer, but it had should pads that made me look like I "was going to fly away." (my sister's words, not mine)
I know it's not proper hijab, but it's the best I could do with the options I was given. Also, next to the rest of the wedding party (and probably most of the people in attendance), I'll obviously stand out as someone who was trying to dress more conservatively. Any thoughts? Please, if you just have complaints keep them to yourself. I KNOW it is not proper hijab, I've already said that, but my relationship with my sister is important and I think we both compromised gracefully. (although she thinks she gave in way more than I did...)
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