Out in Hijab

Candice's post about running into her brother while wearing hijab has prompted me to share some of my own "hijabi tales."

I never leave my husband's apartment without a hijab. There are many Muslims in our building and complex so being seen w/out when they all know of my conversion would almost be a scandal, lol.

So, I always leave HIS apartment (not my house, for clarification) with a scarf on my head.

When we arrive at our destination, though, I always panic depending on where it is we're going. Red Lobster is a frequent destination and I always leave my hijab on for Red Lobster. The only person I've run into there is my doctor. He didn't even notice me. I think sometimes the hijab provides camouflage, because when people don't expect to see you dressed like that, they really actually "don't" see you dressed like that.

When we go to the mall I generally take it off. I left it on one time and felt so nervous the whole time that we only stayed a short while. I saw a friend of my mother's and was walking around so nervously and darting around so she wouldn't see me that I'm sure someone thought I must be shoplifting, lol.

When we go to the park it's always on, although sometimes I get nervous and look down because obviously that "hides" me.

When we go to the "big city" i.e. the state capital it is always on. Odds of running into someone are slim and I think the risk is worth it. Because I really do -want- to wear hijab.

When we go to Babies R Us I leave it on. At Christmastime this was an issue because of all the shoppers. I darted in and out of aisles to avoid a number of people I known that day. There is a girl from my classes who works at BRU and saw me one day. She ignored it, and well, I frankly don't care what she thinks anyway.

I wear it bowling. I saw someone from my education classes there one night. As in someone I spent 3+ hours with a day. She seemed a bit freaked when she realized it was me. And neither of us spoke to each other (at the bowling alley). The next day when we were working together on a group project it didn't come up. Now, over a year and many many hours together later...it still hasn't come up.

I wore it to the eye doctor to pick up my contacts. The lady recognized me and didn't comment. They've seen my husband so they probably think it's something I'm doing for him. Oh well.

I WANTED to wear it to my son's doctor appointment this week. It was just my brother and I at home so I was brave and put it on in a Spanish/pirate style so it wouldn't seem so overtly "Muslim." (My family still hasn't told my bro). Nevertheless, even spanish style my brother called me "burqa girl." I took it off so he wouldn't squeal to the 'rents, but put it back on it the car.

Get this, when I got to the doctor's office, though, my HUSBAND had me take it off. He told me he hated the style and that it was pointless because my neck and ears and small hairs were still showing.

Now, I was very self-conscious about the style. I felt I looked more chemo than Muslim, so I took it off without a fight. With that being said, though, shouldn't he have supported my attempt to be covered, instead of pointing out all the ways he didn't feel it was "proper?" Grr.

One more story, that's it, I promise. For our anniversary, hubby and I went out to Olive Garden with our son. I saw someone I knew, and I saw her stare at me for a long time. I ignored her, like, as in, "I'm not Nikki. I'm some Muslim woman who resembles Nikki." riiiight. Anyway, she obviously noticed me. Turns out she is in the college of nursing with my cousin. Talking to my cousin in the car one night (just us) I was being more open about my acceptance of Islam (not for myself, but as a valid path to God). She told me all about this Muslim man in her class who explained to her the difference between a burqa, niqab, abayat, hijab, etc. A little later in the conversation, she says "Did you go to Olive Garden recently?" I was like, "yeah." She then went on," well, my friend from nursing says she saw you there with (your son) and (your husband). She said you were wearing a burqa." Flustered, I respond with, "must have not been me." She goes on, "I told her I didn't think you wore it, but then again I don't know what you wear when you're out." THIS IS THE POINT IN THE STORY WHERE I SHOULD'VE COME CLEAN. She seemed fairly open to the idea of covering. Instead I laugh it off and say, "I don't even own a burqa, and if I did, I wouldn't want to wear it out." WHICH, in my defense, is ENTIRELY true. I personally think burqa's are gross and demeaning. I should have clarified, though, that it was me, but I was wearing a tunic, pants, and a scarf, NOT an actual burqa.

*sigh* I'm sure she totally knows I lied.



And that, my blogging friends, is just a number of my hijabi tales from my less than one year of being a Muslim. I'm sure as I come to cover more and more often, I will have a number of other stories to share. Hopefully all experiences will go without confrontation. The group I'm most worried about is the branch of my family that's not conservative at all, and then the opposite group, the elders of the church I was raised in. Only time will tell. Insha'Allah the reactions will not be too severe.