So, as I already posted, I went shopping out of town in hijab over the weekend. It was a VERY big shopping center in a rather large town. I saw people from so many nationalities, speaking a variety of languages, yet I didn't see another woman wearing hijab. I must admit that I was quite disappointed to not find even ONE sister in such a large sea of people.
That night hubby took me out to a Lebanese restaurant in the state capital, though. (that sounds weird, but I'm trying not to disclose my location, yet trying to give you a feel for how big the city was) The restaurant was run by a Lebanese hijabi. When we walked in the door she said "As- salamu alaykum." My husband returned the salaam and I said "Hi." What!? Here I am in hijab, so excited to be recognized as a Muslim...and I say "hi." Ugh. At one point my husband went to the counter to ask for a refill for me. He and the woman ended up having a conversation in Arabic. I am horrible at Arabic so once we had some privacy I asked my husband to fill me in. He said that the woman had said "Are you Saudi?" He said "yes." She then said, "I thought saudi's weren't allowed to marry Americans." To which he replied, "we can if they don't know." She then asked if he made me be a Muslim. (which, to my understanding, is impossible...you can't make someone believe anything) He told her that, no, I had converted on my own. After that I noticed her treating me a bit more respectfully (not that she was rude beforehand, but there was a change).
That was my experience with a hijabi, while wearing hijab myself. In summary: missed my chance to salaam, was met with suspicion/curiousity, but ultimately accepted in the end.
My second experience, is more of a lack of experience. I was at the mall yesterday (this one being local...in the town where I go to college) with my mom and sister. I was wearing a maxi skirt and modest short sleeved top because it was very hot and would never have gotten out of the house in long sleeves without being interrogated and harassed by my parents. I was looking through some clothing racks with my sister when I saw two Muslim women approaching. One looked to be a little older than my mother and I believe the other was probably her daughter (late 20's early 30's perhaps). I saw these women and immediately wanted to talk to them. Tell them, salaam, tell them I am Muslim, too. But in my short sleeves and bare head I felt inadequate. I knew I was unrecognizable as a sister to them. To them I was just another staring face in the crowd...but really I was staring for entirely different reasons! My sister didn't really act like she noticed them, but i'm sure she did. Ever since I got first involved with my husband and especially now that i've stopped wearing shorts, my family is on constant "Muslim alert." I think they study these other Muslims so that they'll be able to catch me in the act early on if I ever show 'symptoms.' I wish I was kidding.
So for experience two I was not wearing hijab myself. In summary: wished I had the opportunity to salaam but felt it wouldn't be accepted, I was very curious and longing to be recognized as a sister, and my sister was (probably) suspicious. And in the end, we went our seperate ways without a word being said.
Insha'Allah I will soon come out to my family and become a full-time hijabi.
2 comments:
When it comes to telling your family, I wish you well..
Anyhow, I have had experiences similar to yours. Despite seeing my Hijab many sisters here have to ask if I am a muslim. When I reply "Yes Alhamdulilah" they say yes of course you became Muslim because of your husband" Then I have to reply with a sharp "NO I was a Muslim before I met my husband"
It really irritates me and gets on my nerves.. but once they find out that I converted on my own, then their attitude changes for the better toward me. ARGHHH!
*cough cough* comment two lol. where i'm from there a nice town to the south of me which has a realtiveley large population of muslims. i used to go there before i converted and look at their veils and stuff. now when i see them i try to say salam or at least smile. i absolutely love seeing them. at first though i didn't say it i just smiled and looked away. i think they might have been able to tell i am a convert but i don't know. they may thing that i'm very light skinned or maybe turkish. (ve gotten that one before)
and i think my family still does that. the watch muslim women cuz they still don't believe that i have more rights. but i hope they look at the more now with a kind of respect instead of a... "o its just a repressed muslim lady"
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